Who Am I?

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I recently read David’s prayer in 1 Chronicles 17 when he learned that God was not going to let him build the Temple but He was going to establish David’s family and allow one of his sons to build the Temple. It inspired me. I have deep feelings about being a pastor — all mixed up feelings. Inadequacy, fear, pride, ambition (good & bad), awe, humility, just to name a few!

So after reading David’s prayer I was inspired to write a prayer of thanksgiving about being a pastor at our church.

Who am I, O Lord God, that you have brought me this far? I come from no renown or pedigree. What do I bring to serve you that is worthy of this honor? Who am I that I would serve you in this way?

You know me. You know my weaknesses and my vain ambitions. You know how easily I could fall. How quickly I can tarnish your Name. You know how weary I become, how impatient I am, how harsh I can be. Who am I?

It is not who I am, but who You are. No other god or religion picks up men and women and dusts off their broken lives and makes them a stage a for glory.

You make a name for yourself from the people of your church. You perform the miracle of redemption in the heart of your enemies and adopt them as your children. Who is like you?

Now, O LORD, I am your servant, the shepherd of your fold in this place. Do as you wish with me, with this church. May your name be established and honored all the days of my life. When people look at me may they be attracted to You. May my life reflect you and honor you till you call me home.

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5 “Limp” Statements on Christian Leadership

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I’ve been reading Dan Allender’s book, Leading With A Limp. I thought I would post a few a quotes that have really impacted me.

Statement #1. “A priest (leader) must struggle with the temptation to please people rather than call them to maturity. It is far easier to tell happy stories that are full of delusion and lies than to name the story of our deceit and flight.” (pg. 60)

Statement #2. “Don’t miss this: leadership that mimics Jesus will not be normal. It will be neither expected nor, in most cases, preferred. It will be disruptive and anomalous, and it will demand one’s body and soul, fortune, reputation, and all the other small gods that keep our lives safe and satisfied.” (pg. 55)

Statement #3. “He calls us to brokenness, not performance; to relationships, not commotion; to grace, not success. It is no wonder that this kind of leadership is neither spoken of not admired in our business schools or even our seminaries.” (pg. 55)

Statement #4. “Honest hunger after truth requires us to remain open to everyone, including those with whom we disagree and have conflict. It also requires that we remain open to the fact that we desperately need the very people who challenge and contradict our cherished notions of the truth. We many never agree, nor do we need to do so, but we need others–especially those who challenge us to dig deeper and become more human. The hunger, then, is not so much for agreement on factual accounts, but more for troth (covenant-type relationships) that leads to a greater delight in the truth.” (pg. 121)

Statement #5. “The beauty of a limp is that it slows you down, it forces you to take more time, it prevents you from doing as much as you’d like to do. The paradox of death leading to life requires that you disappoint many to please ONE.” (pg. 136)

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